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Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth

Female Felonship Alert: Jen Shah and Elizabeth Holmes Are 'Rehabilitating' Besties Behind Bars

The wasp and the Real Housewife have "bonded" on "their journey of positive change," according to Shah's attorney.

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Photo: David Paul Morris, Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank (Getty Images)

This week, in we’re-living-in-the-most-unserious-simulation news: former Real Housewife of Salt Lake City star Jen Shah and girlboss grifter Elizabeth Holmes have reportedly become besties while behind bars at a federal prison camp in Bryan, Texas.

In a new People exclusive, Shah’s attorney, Chris Giovanni, told the outlet that Shah and Holmes have managed to establish some real convict camaraderie in the last few months. I mean, I suppose this makes sense. In 2022, Theranos founder Holmes was convicted on fraud charges and sentenced to 11 years in prison, while Shah was sentenced to 78 months in prison in January after pleading guilty to her role in a telemarketing conspiracy in which countless elderly people were robbed of their retirement funds.

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“They’re friends. They’re both rehabilitating and have bonded over being on this journey of positive change,” Giovanni told People. “Their situations brought them together, and they have a good understanding of one another. They’re getting through it together.” So basically, Shah and Holmes are braiding each other’s hair and borrowing the other’s orange jumpsuit.

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Now, you might wonder what a wasp and a Real Housewife have in common. In short: delusion. By now, we all know the story of how Holmes hoodwinked scores of people into thinking she’d revolutionized healthcare, but let’s revisit her sentencing hearing, shall we? At one point, the prosecution asserted that Holmes once told a Walgreens executive, “They don’t put attractive people like me in jail.” Those who’ve seen even one episode of the first season of the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City might recognize that kind of arrogance. For instance, Shah’s tagline for her second-to-last season on the show—the one that saw her arrested by the FBI on camera—was: “The only thing I’m guilty of is being Shah-mazing.”

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Speaking of! In prison, Shah apparently has become something of a fitness instructor and holds classes like “Sha-mazing Abs.” Holmes, Giovanni claims, is a regular.

“Jen gets all the ladies together and they rally behind her while she teaches them fitness moves, and Elizabeth has been there right along with them,” the attorney said. But their friendship isn’t all flat tummies and talk of crooked pasts. Apparently, Shah has also met Holmes’ family.

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“Jen’s given her a lot of advice,” Giovanni said of his now-“peaceful” client. “She’s even met Elizabeth’s baby and held her.” Nice!

Giovanni concluded that Shah is “reunion-ready” but failed to specify whether that meant reunion with her family on the outside, or, well, the kind that Andy Cohen moderates. Either way, here’s to this newfound felon friendship!